I guess when they say that you can't stop the beat, they mean it. Man, oh man. I never saw this one coming. When the phone rang and the director from The Festival Theatre, Armand Marchand was on the phone, I nearly fainted. I have been offered and have accepted three roles in this summer's production of Hairspray. It has been a dream of mine. This whole Hairspray thing. Edna Turnblad. But Mr. Pinky. Freakin Mr. Pinky? Pinky Perfect! I am tickled pink. I am going to be in the most amazing production of Hairspray. Measuring the bust of the one and only Edna. I knew it, I could feel it in my heart. Who knew that it would happen this way?

The glasses. Myrna knew, it was the glasses.

I AM IN FREAKIN HAIRSPRAY. Pinch me.